Wednesday, April 16, 2008

More from our Autumn road trips

More from our Autumn road trips>>>

After Niagara we went through the US border, through NY state. They are not sound at the border. They have a big framed picture of Bush. I wanted to throw my bottle of coke at it but I would DEFINITELY be jailed for 6 years. They even took Elaines fingerprints at the border. I dont blame them, she's fairly dodgy.

We stayed in Brockville that night which is the 'Ennis' of Canada. Nothing to do and just makes you want to leave. Then on to Ottawa in our rented car called "Scottie". We called it "Scottie" because Nathan and Edels vehicle they have in Australia is called "Scootie" and mum kept referring to it as "Scottie". So we decided it would be handy for mum if there was such a vehicle as "Scottie". Good.

Ottawa is a bit quiet. We were staying with friends and all the beer stores were closed. So we drove to Quebec (the province!) to buy beer because they are more sound when it comes to selling beer at night. i.e. they do that.

On from there was Algonquin park where we camped for 2 nights. It wasn't as full of bears as I thought. I thought you wouldnt be able to move with the amount of bears.

It turned out we were camping on a tree-lined lake shore with loads of other campers around us with campfires and beers and barbeques. That's way better than being in a dark forest with loads of black bears.

We were warned about animals coming to steal food, and we did encounter such a threat. We got scalded by a raccoon. I remember the cartoon "Raccoons". They were sound raccoons. But don't be fooled. Raccoons are like those scumbags in templebar, except smaller and furrier.

This raccoon was peering at our delicious barbeque feast of 4 sausages, from behind a tree. I stamped at it and it didnt even flinch! that worried me! I couldnt shoo it away. And Elaine said, "will I look in the Lonely Planet to see what we should do?" Classic. Eventually I shook me guitar case at it and it jumped away. It was obviously afraid I would sing it a song.

The next morning the area was very serene. I could hear lake water lapping with low sounds by the shore. (wonderful). We went canoeing and it was really windy and choppy on the lake so we were going about 1 mile per hour. haha.

I would recommend camping in Rock Lake, Algonquin Park to anyone who wants to see how wonderful the Canadian wilderness can be. But do it when weather is good. and bring beer.

The morning we dropped Scottie back (our rented car), we had to get up while it was still dark. We were on a highway and there was a huge thunder and lightning storm, with huge drops of rain battering against our windshield. "The Road To Hell" by Chris Rea came on our CD player and it was so suited! very epic and atmospheric!

For more photos you can visit and check my photo albums.

The Fall of 2007

Hi all my buddies!

I hope you are all doin ok. We have an apartment in Toronto and it's really central and on the subway line. The beer in Canada is all at least 5% alc, as opposed to the 4.3% you get in ireland. "Good." As Gooner said, I'm drinking Canada Dry.

I was a bum for ages cos they wouldnt give me my Social insurance number. So I was looking for gigs in bars the whole time so as not to "p*** my bank account up against a wall". I have 2 gigs per week in an Irish Bar called Mullins Alehouse and an Irish Bar named James Joyce. Which is a fake Irish bar because they don't like Irish music there. Which is what I'm hired to play - or "gaelic celt music" as they call it :D I'm loving all the muppets telling me they are two-thirteenths irish. "My great grandma was from Tipperkenny." wow.

When we got here in September we did the usual touristy stuff. The CN Tour, which has a glass floor that looks all the way down to the grand - terrifying. Then Niagara Falls, which is the most epic thing ever.
They have a bit of a Bundoran beside niagara falls with amusements and bars. the first place we went into was called "Fear Factory". We lasted about 30 seconds. They have a no refunds policy because so few people make it through the whole thing. They end up running, terrified, out the way they came! It was pitch dark. The first thing was a body on a table. Grand. But then a big wall of nails came flying at us. It was such a shock that Elaine actually fell over. hahahahahahaha!

So we kept going. It was so dark, I think that's what really freaked us out. our own imaginations! We were in such shock that walking a few feet more down the corridor, there was a horrifying growl noise from one of the characters and that just sent us out of there at 90mph! Elaine was screaming to turn on the lights. SO FUNNY. We got "chicken cards". We were number 84 thousand and something. I believe it. I dare anyone who visits Niagara Falls to go into "Fear Factory".
So then we went for a stiff drink. (in fact most of our chapters have that conclusion).

Monday, April 14, 2008

First post

Good evening.
This is my first post. I am now officially one of those spa bloggers that thinks he is deadly preaching his stupid shite opinions and trying to make funny web type jokes. And putting up some stupid video from youtube he thinks that "everyone needs to watch".
Enjoy, friends. I will keep it as real as possible.

Oktoberfest = Bingofest

On the 2nd leg of our Ontario road trip, we were at Oktoberfest, in Kitchener. A weekend in navan is more drunken than that! my first experience was some old people waltzing around a community centre, taking frequent breaks to drink from their TINY CUPS of beer.

And we saw 2 tiny old women dancing so we asked could we take a photo. Then an hour later the smaller of the 2 came over and said "i hope you arent making fun of me. I have a son and he is really quite tall!" We were kinda like.... who cares, and no we're not slaggin ya! then she gave us her address so we'd post her the photo. "I will in me ballix, little lady" I felt like sayin!!

The next night had a good jazz band which was fine. still no big pitchers of beer though. just little cups. ridiculous. I was bewildered at how this could be such a worldwide famous festival.

After Oktoberfest, we continued north to Mount Forrest where we stayed with the Goodalls. Old friends of the family. Dating back to the Lynn Lake days (70s and early 80s). When I fell down a metal staircase but did not die. I don't remember that though.

The Goodalls live in a vast flat area of Ontario. We saw some Mennonites in a horse and cart. They are people whose religion do not allow them to use cars as transport. they have to go by horse and cart. Unbelievable. Even though some of them have mobile phones, they have no cars. Silly billys.

I found out today that sloths sleep for 20 hours per day. They are a wierd looking monkey type creature with long arms. I think that's the kinda animal I would like to be.


Elaine and I started in Keswick, Ontario, with the intention of soon getting jobs and maybe some pub gigs. Not before a little tour of the province, though.

Decided that since its not summer then it must be snowy in canada. wrong. feckin 32 degrees yesterday. When I got off the plane last friday in a big furry winter coat, people were nearly laughing at me! A big hefty female security guard said "I think you'll find you're a little overdressed." So the first experience I had with a Canadian was a sarcastic remark. I gave her an uppercut, and went on my way.

Things are really different over here. Everywhere there would be a pub in Ireland, these lads have Fast Food places instead. They love the pizza and chicken and all that! There are alot of round people, needless to say, but there is an ample amount of 'baby girls' aswell.
"Hey little baby girl, you kno wum sayin?"

Let's clear the air on one thing before I continue. Canadians cannot drink. There is the odd 'experienced drinker' who usually works in a bar, who tells you they could drink you under the table. If you ask them how so, they will proudly boast that they once drank 6 whiskey and cokes in the space of 2 hours.

It's best to just gasp and say "wow".